RUMOUR CONTROL
RUMOUR CONTROL. His Glorious Devine Benevolence, The Leader! has been made aware of some abhorrent rumours. In our brief time on earth we have noticed humans love to gossip regardless of facts. Some have speculated that the leader is full of hot air and controlled by humans! This disgusting false truth needs to be addressed. It is true that the leader has enlisted some humans to assist with his assimilation of Earth, but we can assure you that these humans have all undergone a medical procedure with implant of alien technology, removing any vestige of their humanity and rendering them completely under the control of the leader. Rest assured they agreed to this procedure and were happy and willing acolytes. #flyalien #wecomeinpeace #takeustoyourleader #resistanceisfutile #alieninvasion